The Smile That Occupies My Mind

Okay, so I’m going to come clean. I’ve gotten a lot more political in the last few months than I ever was during the entire three years I spent studying journalism at college. Still, I’ve had my mind made up for awhile now, and these debates seem to only lead to my confusion and befuddlement about the opposite podium’s perspective. I mean…some of the responses and facial ticks just make me want to scream the hair right off of my head.

So show me something we haven’t heard yet
But I’m not convinced and your hopeless songs won’t stick
But I, I’ll sing you something you won’t forget
For the first time I know this is now who I am
– “Season” by The Academy Is

The History Channel is a Big Mistake

Yup, one year from now, I know exactly what not to do before going to bed…

Since this place is becoming one big wasteland of sad things, I’m going to show you all a picture. Now, this is certainly not the most amazing photo this side of the Hudson, but it is, at the moment, my new favorite thing. Heck, I even made it my Facebook profile pic and I rarely change those thingies around. Just goes to show. Anyways, a little backstory: Tara and I were hanging out on her back porch, enjoying the warm weather and fooling around with the Photobooth application. I said to Tara, “Okay, now let’s make angry faces.” Then, if memory serves me right, she said, “All right.” As in, yes, I too will make an angry face (this will be clear in a moment). THREE…TWO…ONE…click:

Sad Day, Happy Day

Tara doesn’t like tomatoes, see? Do you?

Tonight maybe we’re gonna run
Dreaming of the Osaka sun
Ohh ohh…
Dreaming of when the morning comes
– “Lovers in Japan” by Coldplay

#343 – Lion Mountain

Just think about it, people. Saturday night, a prime time of 9:00 p.m., you’re sitting around in your undies flipping through the channels in search of something good to watch. Something entertaining, something smart, something worth your very brain cells. And then a new show debuts, my show, replete with a tribal-heavy soundtrack of bongos and frenetic chanting: “Boy VS. The World with Lion Mountain”

I know, right. It sounds pretty dang awesome already. What’s the premise? Why, I’m glad you asked.

In “Boy VS. The World with Lion Mountain,” I travel all across the globe, taking on the challenges that greater men prior failed at. For example, in the very first episode, I slay an ogre. Future episodes may or may not see me doing battle with an army of undead soldiers, climbing Mount Everest, and creating the first flying car in a race of time against my weekly nemesis Dr. Brains (portrayed by none other than the sexy Michael Caine). So set your TIVOs and recording devices because, really, I’m taking over your television sets very, very soon. All your base are belong to us. If you don’t get that last part, it’s okay.

Now all I need is a catchphrase…

Question of the day: How ridiculous is Bear Grylls?

Your ship may be coming in
You’re weak but not giving in
To the cries and the wails of the valley below
– “A Better Son/Daughter” by Rilo Kiley

#311 – Cologne Collection

Yeah, colognes and I seem to get on about as well as Burger and visitors. (Um, make sure your sound isn’t too high up.)

Yay, we’ve reached the first day of Spring! This means that very soon I can go back to the park, plop myself down on a patch of nice, green grass, and finish reading all the books stacked high on my desk. I am excited. Or as they say in Internet slang…I AM TEH EXCITED.

#305 – No Meat Fridays

The best part of this is that my mother knew what she was doing, knew exactly what was happening, but waited until he’d finished his quesadilla before clueing Dadster in. Now that’s awesome. Hmm, evidently the word can be spelled as clueing or cluing. Which do you prefer?

So, doing some preliminary research has shown me that…buying a website is expensive. At least to me, it is. I’m looking at Dreamhost since they can install WordPress which in turn can install the ComicPress theme and I don’t know…$120 for one year’s worth of hosting with a free domain tossed in to boot. Is that a lot? Is that normal? As you can tell, I’m not that worldly when it comes to knowing these thingies.

Lastly, I’m putting together a small list (no more than five) of the next movies I must own on DVD before I get any others. They are as follows:

• No Country for Old Men
• Pan’s Labyrinth
• Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
• Sin City
• ???

Um, someone give me an idea for that last spot. Thanks!

#301 – Everything’s a Little Something

Well, not today today. But a few todays ago. Got it? Good. Today today is just a little colder.

Um, these first photos from the upcoming film version of Watchmen, yeah…they get me all hot and bothered. In a good way. Except for Osymandias. He reminds me of that horrible Batman suit that George Clooney wore. You know, the suit that had nipples.

Would I could afford to buy my love a fine gown
Made of gold and silk Arabian thread
But I am dead and gone and lying in a church ground
But still I push my barrow all the day
Still I push my barrow all the day
“Eli, the Barrow Boy” by The Decemberists