…and you thought your life was exciting!

Archive for the ‘old people’ Category

That One Weekend in July 2009

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I dunno… felt like drawing the latest weekend in terms of journal comics again because I do miss doing them from time to time despite having no future plans of returning to them:


How did your weekend turn out?

Feeling independent
I made it through another day
Having a wonderful time
I haven’t felt the sickness
I think i may have scared it away
Looks like I’m gonna be fine

– “Fix” by Pedro the Lion

The First Big Snowstorm of the Season

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Here’s how one of the photos turned out.

Of course, since then, Clifton’s been slammed a high number of times with dumpings of snow and it is no longer as exciting as it once was. Unless you’re six years old, and then it rocks because it definitely means one thing and one thing only: day off of school. Ah, nostalgia is washing over me as I type. Let’s end on this note then…

We’ve only got one chance to put this at an end
And cross the patron saint of switchblade fights
You said we’re not celebrities, we spark and fade
They die by threes, I’ll make you understand
And you can trade me for an apparition

– “Our Lady of Sorrows” by My Chemical Romance

Written by Paul

December 19, 2008 at 2:14 pm

Back Pain Makes It Hard To Be Alive

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Whether is was dorsalgia or lumbago, it sucked. I could barely move, and if I somehow did barely move…shrieking pain throughout my whole body. Fun times for all. Not shown in the above drawing, of course, is the actual amount of cursing I did at every twitch and twist. Sailors would’ve blushed.

But no worries. The pain subsided after two or three days, and luckily most of those were spent comfortably in my apartment where I could cuss and moan to my heart’s content.

I hope this isn’t what it’s like to be old. That’s going to suck. Any old farts wanna confirm this, hmm?

She drifts off to sleep
And in her dreams
She lives in California
In a mansion by the sea
Yeah, that’s who she could be

– “Carolina” by Josh Rouse

Written by Paul

December 1, 2008 at 10:05 am

My Shopping Cart Gets Stolen

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So, guess who it was that stole my shopping cart:
A. Regina Spektor
B. Victoria’s Secret lingerie model
C. Michael Caine in the role of Alfred Pennyworth
D. A smelly old lady that made me feel bad cause I was totally ready to yell at her but then she feigned memory loss or whatever and pretended like she never stole my cart in the first place, but merely misplaced it somewhere over by the paper products aisle.

Take your time, really. No pressure. I’m here all day.

Go lightly from the ledge, babe
Go lightly on the ground
I’m not the one you want, babe
I will only let you down

– “It Ain’t Me, Babe” by Bob Dylan

Written by Paul

November 13, 2008 at 11:49 am

Voting Isn’t As Exciting As People Claim

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On Election Day, I read post after post after post about these…feelings people were experiencing upon voting in the 2008 presidential election. Elation, excitement, the I-just-cured-cancer jitters! They must’ve voted at Heaven’s gates or within Lothlorien. I dunno, I got nothing. Here’s how the voting went down for me: I drove to the middle school down the road, showed the old man my registration card, signed the sign-in book (was the first name, of course), voted, thanked the fellow guarding the booth, and left. Total time…roughly under five minutes. No bells, no whistles, not even a “I Voted!” sticker was obtained. It might have been the tamest five minutes of my life if it wasn’t for all the old man calling me Pauly and telling me that the girl that had just voted before me…well, he coached her father in Little League back in the day. Thanks, old guy. I wish I could’ve taken you home with me. You were oh so the c-word.

How could it be
I’m the only one who sees
Your rehearsed insanity

– “I’ll Stick Around” by Foo Fighters

Written by Paul

November 4, 2008 at 6:37 pm

Posted in comics, life, old people, politics

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The Solution to the Scorn of Old People

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New rule! If nothing interesting or exciting or cartoonishly obtuse happens that is worth me exploring or even spending more than five minutes thinking about, I’m just gonna make shit up. I’ll leave it to y’all to play detective/CSI agent and figure out what is real and what is not. So go ahead. Start investigating…

Karma police
Arrest this man
He talks in maths
He buzzes like a fridge
He’s like a de-tuned radio

– “Karma Police” by Radiohead

Written by Paul

October 21, 2008 at 6:39 pm

Old Guy on the Bench Outside

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Do not fret, concerned citizens! I’ve seen him every morning since this morning. Yes, I worried for nothing, but when you live in an apartment complex that is 95% old people, 3% cats, and 2% me…well, you know that people a-come and then they a-go. Such is the wheel of time…

Written by Paul

August 27, 2008 at 8:45 pm

The Cover of Darkness

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Yes, I’m like a ninja. Only less stylish. Hmm, that old lady looks familiar…

Written by Paul

August 10, 2008 at 7:27 pm

Using Telepathy is Scary

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It was at this moment that we stopped playing and pretended neither of us were freaked out. But we were. I blame it on Walter Cronkite. Coffee ice cream, chocolate syrup, and whipped cream seemed to diminish my telepathic powers, and my stomach had no problem with that…

Oh, and this is the Etc. game for those that don’t know. It might seem simple or easy, but it can be tough and fun (and hectic, if you play with me and my mouth screams). Don’t buy it for $14.99 though. Hit up your local Five and Below!

Written by Paul

August 8, 2008 at 5:19 pm

Goopy White Beard Hair

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I can think of no better proof than the above that there is absolutely somebody for everybody out there. First this, then plucking old man hair out of my beard. Tara is a true trooper. I will half-apologize for the goop. I did not know my body could produce such a…substance.

And now I feel the urge to quote from Ridley Scott’s Gladiator: Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?

Written by Paul

August 5, 2008 at 7:51 pm