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Archive for April 2009

The Burning Showergasm

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Actually, that spot behind the knee, that one was more like twenty-five orgasms all fighting to be King of the Hill. So heavenly. Yes, I’ve been called a masochist many times before, a claim which I never rebuke.

Oh, don’t it hurt deep inside
To see someone do something to her
Oh, don’t it pain to see someone cry
How especially if that someone is her

– “Silence is Golden” by Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons

Written by Paul

April 29, 2009 at 8:42 am

Recepción a Otro Mundo

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Okay, you caught me…I don’t actually own a mini-cactus, but if I did I’d totally place it next to my alarm clock to create these funny Full House-like situations (this is something Uncle Joey would totally do and you know it).

But yeah, somehow I’ve been oversleeping normal alarm clock and my cell phone alarm, which most people would compare to the sound of seven fire trucks all converging towards the same burning building. Huh, go figure. So, this works…for now, despite those rare mornings where I really have no idea where I am.

Also, feel free to correct my Spanish. I did what I could with it…

QUESTION OF THE DAY: How many alarms does it take to get a hobbit out of bed?

Does the couch pull out?
Are you kissed goodnight?
How is Memphis tonight?
I don’t believe that everybody’s lonely underneath it all.

– “I’m Winning the Race” by Inkwell

Written by Paul

April 26, 2009 at 10:44 pm

A Comic Strip from Many Years Ago

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…ah, yeah. 1998. What a year for drawing about cats eating frogs eating flies! I guess that would place me at around…15 years old. Eep! Also, please note that I still letter my comics THE SAME FREAKING WAY ELEVEN YEARS LATER.

So yeah, my sister D was recently cleaning up around her condo and she stumbled upon a letter I wrote to her when she was in college, and this half-pint of a comic strip was included. I have no recollection of ever drawing it or writing it, but that’s the best part about unearthing this lost “gems.” I’m sure there’s more out there…yet this makes me sad still about the Appalling Purging of 2000, where I trashed and ripped up a ton of my stuff in an angst-emo-fueled fit of rage. Sigh…

We didn’t start the fire
But when we are gone
Will it still burn on, and on, and on, and on…

– “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel

Written by Paul

April 25, 2009 at 10:56 am

Posted in animals, artwork, comics, D, funny, life

Name Our Boxy Baby

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Yup, that’s right. Tara popped one out, and it’s a next-gen videogame system! Dun dun dunnnnn. I guess the ultrasound lied.

Okay, truth is, I saved up me moneys from published short stories and freelance art gigs and made the big purchase a few days ago. It’s heavenly and amazing and superawesometimetown (not a word). But there’s a problem. As evidence shows, I can’t help but name inanimate objects (Tara says, “Don’t call our baby an inanimate object!”), but I’m struggling to come up with one for the ol’ Xbox 360. I need your help. Some criteria to consider:

  1. It’s a boy.
  2. It’s name cannot be Sam, Samuel, Samwise, Sammy, Sammich, Samamamamamama, or anything else Sam-like.
  3. It does not have to be an actual name. Considering my laptop’s name is Macaroni.

If I lurve your name (lurve is a greater state of love, for those not in the know), you might just get a free drawing out of this. So suggest away, and may your babies be plentiful!

Go go go
Go have a baby
Go have a baby
Baby, baby

– “Baby” by The Psychedelic Teacups

Written by Paul

April 18, 2009 at 8:47 pm

GUEST COMIC: Hello, I’m a Tuna and My Name is Herb

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Check out this wonderful guest comic for MyLifeComics from Tara the Girlfriend!

But yeah, some people shouldn’t be teachers. In this group, I include people that watch The Hills and think it is real, people that wear sunglasses indoors and at night, as well as people that don’t know the difference between a hard h and a soft h.

So, I have all these comics sketched out on tiny scraps of paper. Seriously, there’s at least ten I want to do before I even start thinking about others. But I’m no longer in a rush. They will go up some time in the future. Plus, once I get an Xbox 360, I’m probably going to drop off the planet. Enjoy the guest comic for the meantime, and I’ll see y’all when I see y’all.

I’m just asking for honesty now
I need a reason to keep you away
A reason to keep you at arm’s length
I never should have let you back in

– “At Arm’s Length” by Feeling Left Out

Written by Paul

April 14, 2009 at 9:39 pm

An Epiphany

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Er, yeah. Anyways…

Here’s some fellow journal comics that I’ve been reading and enjoying, which in turn means you should be reading and enjoying them as well:

  • Oh, Arlene! – Great style, light-hearted snippets of life, and every now and then some color!
  • Looks Like Rain – Mmm gorgeous line art. Plus, y’know, the occasional boob or two. Nearly up-to-date in terms of posting comics as they happen.
  • Inkdick – There’s always an adventure with Sir Pranas at the steering wheel.
  • Squid Arms – Kinda random, kinda all over the place in terms of subjects and style and substenance, but maybe that’s why I like it
  • Gingercurls – Dream comics done by Tara, also known around here as that girl who almost always comments first on every post

There, that was fun. Are you reading any that I’m not?

Quiet and pensive
My thoughts apprehensive
The hours drift away
Leaving my homeland
Playing a lone hand
My life begins today

– “Fly By Night” by Rush

Written by Paul

April 2, 2009 at 1:21 pm