…and you thought your life was exciting!

#369 – Dreaming of Willie

with 11 comments

Circa 2003, my best friend abandoned me. It’d probably make for a more cinematic story to say that I had no idea where he disappeared to, but the truth is I know exactly where he went. Cleveland, Ohio. Home to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and other thingies. It seems odd to suddenly have such a dream about the boy-that-couldn’t, but such is the way life works. It’s not as if I don’t think about him; I do. Yet it makes me half-itchy to find him again, to get to him, to see if everything is all right. Then again, he left me behind, and I’ll never know nor understand why. And if he was ever curious to find me, there’d be no excuses whatsoever. I’m quite Google-able. But he hasn’t and he won’t. Which is a shame, really. I treated him like the brother I didn’t have. These truly are the worst of bad dreams, the kind that seem so real and make you wake up with your heart in your throat; I hope my next dream is more fun and brimming with friendly dragons, magical quests, and beautiful maidens that sound like Regina Spektor and look like…well, Regina Spektor. But maidenly.

Cross your fingers, people!

At the edge of the rest of your life
At the end of a one-way road
I was losing everything
And tonight may never shine
If you never open your eyes
I keep this heart right next to mine

– “The Sirens Sing” by The Anniversary

Written by Paul

June 11, 2008 at 12:00 am

Posted in death, dreams, family, weirdness

Tagged with , , , ,

11 Responses

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  1. I’ve been on the other side of this equation, but I had my reasons(important to me they were), and it’s pretty much just as bad on that side. It’s like a fucked up chemistry problem, it’s balanced out on both sides, and they both suck ass.


    June 11, 2008 at 12:55 am

  2. Can totally relate-to bad dreams and to losing contact with a really good friend(s) (both times the friend moved-one out of state, the other out of the country but then returned, I know because she visited me once and then I never heard from her again.)

    I’ve lived in the same city since 1968. I’m in the phone book. Oh well.


    June 11, 2008 at 8:59 am

  3. tgjason: Yeah, it’s a stinky equation. Math is stinky. I never know how to solve for X and whatnot.

    Trina: I’m gonna look you up in the phonebook! Just kidding. I don’t even have one. Do people still use them?


    June 11, 2008 at 10:18 am

  4. Actually, I use

    I just looked me up and there I am.

    Hmmm, that sounded kind of existential

    Aack! I just noticed it has my age listed there, too. And my middle name. And my maiden name.

    So there’s just no excuse for not finding me!


    June 11, 2008 at 10:34 am

  5. Sorry to hear about your friend Paul.

    And nightmares blow. I used to be happy that I remembered my dreams so often, but lately they are a much higher percentage bad than good, so I’m rethinking that whole “happy to remember” thing.

    Here’s to better dreams for you this week.


    June 11, 2008 at 11:17 am

  6. It IS sad… especially not knowing what happened, and worrying about if your dream is true and not being able to convey your well-wishes to him. We’ve all been there… People drift in and out of your life. I think your bad dreams are cuz of the heat… But sending you good thoughts for fun dreams tonight! (And maybe turning on the AC might help? But I know you won’t…)


    June 11, 2008 at 11:59 am

  7. Kelly: Yeah, I definitely remember more of my bad dreams than fun, good ones. Bah to that!

    Lisa: A masochist like moi will never give in to such pleasures! 😛


    June 11, 2008 at 1:34 pm

  8. Whew– That IS really sad… :\ I have dreams like that a lot, actually had one the night before of a friend I had in high school that I don’t really talk to. It’s really sad and I wish there was something else to say, I really do hope you have better dreams, darlin’, Regina Spektor? That sounds good, though I prefer Jack Black or…say… colin firth. ::shrugs::

    and GAH, Cleveland, Ohio? Blech. That’s where the crackhead resides currently. It’s been called by my father as “the mistake on the lake”. It really isn’t a bad place (well some parts) but yeah, bad associations I guess.

    Whew, well I just got back from Asbury and I’m about ready to pass out, bleh, it was such a long and painful day but in the end it all works out. Asbury isn’t a bad place…. granted there are some bad places, but hey, my family is down there, I can’t avoid it.

    Mmmm….so I came home, and checked this directly–first priority :p is that sad? Perhaps I’m just devoted.


    June 11, 2008 at 5:03 pm

  9. This one made me sad. I lost touch with my best friend from high school and I think about her often…


    June 11, 2008 at 5:44 pm

  10. My nightmare is worse than yours. I had and have no friends.


    June 12, 2008 at 11:34 am

  11. These sorts of dreams are definitely the worst. Although, they always make me feel like writing.


    June 22, 2008 at 3:05 pm

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