…and you thought your life was exciting!

Archive for July 2007

#154 – Rained On

with 3 comments

This rain came out of nowhere. And see that short distance from my building to my car? Yeah, you got drenched. But we toughed it out. Hey, a boy’s gotta eat on the day after his birthday. The drive was worse though. Some parts of the highway were flooded, and me having a tiny car, I was worried you’d end up seeing me on the news later drifting down Route 46 or something.

After driving through some deep water my mother made me tap on the breaks a bazillion times to make sure they were workin’. She’s crazy. Also, she’s in the other room right now yelling to my father about something to do with cooking breakfast. Ah, good to be home.

Tonight I am seeing one of the few women that I’d actually propose to. I’ll let you ponder that one over the weekend…

Written by Paul

July 20, 2007 at 1:04 pm

Posted in birthday, D, family, momma dukes

#153 – Putting Out

with 5 comments

My counter to this was $5.00 and that I only have to put out halfway. Don’t think about that too hard. It really doesn’t make sense.

In other news, long weekend coming up for me. There’ll be a concert, probably a second viewing of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Scrabble, and lots of sleep in a house full of air conditioning. I am excited. Mmm sleeping…

Written by Paul

July 19, 2007 at 12:39 pm

Posted in harry potter, movies

#152 – Tennis, Anyone?

with 6 comments

If, in fact, his wife was to blame then she has a terrible swing. I think this is all I have to say for this one. Too tired to actually ponder anything. Oh well?


No, nevermind.

Written by Paul

July 18, 2007 at 12:36 pm

Posted in sports

#151 – A New Order

with 4 comments

I had to do this one in color to show you all that I am in no way, shape, or form one of those Gryffindors. It seems that each and every time I take one of those “which house are you in?” quizzes I always end up being with Cho Chang in Ravenclaw. Well, actually, one time I was a Huffleclaw, which sounds dirtier than it actually is.

i'm in ravenclaw!

be sorted @

Now, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is simply the worst movie of the bunch. It’s as if all the people behind it actually spat on the book. I understand things have to be cut. It is the largest book, and there are a couple of (somewhat) unimportant subplots. That is fine. My gripe is with the changes they made because it’s just going to ruin the franchise. A mini-list of things that bothered me:

  • Sirius was not killed by the Avada Kedavra curse.
  • Neville Longbottom could see the thestrals, along with Harry and Luna.
  • Lupin was supposed to be with the Order when they came to sneak Harry out of Privet Drive.
  • It is not revealed that Petunia has some knowledge of magic in the beginning.
  • Why couldn’t they have just explained the centaurs’ hostility toward Hogwarts so that when they carried off Umbridge it would have been oh so much more sweeter?
  • Firenze was supposed to be the new Divinations professor, that would have been the greatest.
  • Dobby finds the Room of Requirement, not Longbottom.
  • Yeah, at the end, Harry is supposed to go on a mad rampage in Dumbledore’s office. But they totally toned him down in the film. What happened to the whiny, angry boy that I remember from the book?
  • Kreacher didn’t deceive Harry, leading him to the Ministry. In fact, the pureblood-loving house elf was a complete waste of special effects.
  • The Occlumency scenes with Snape were cut severely short, probably because the directors didn’t want to make Harry’s father seem like a complete jerk. Newsflash: he was.
  • No Ron and Hermione as Prefects. Boo.
  • The attack on Mr. Weasley was supposed to eventually lead everyone to St. Mungo’s where we would learn more about Longbottom’s parents.
  • The prophecy isn’t fully heard.
  • It’s never revealed that Umbridge is the one that released the Dementors on Harry in the beginning, trying to discredit him. Man, I hate that woman.

Okay, this is enough for now. I’m starting to get depressed. What a terrible movie.

Written by Paul

July 17, 2007 at 1:15 pm

Posted in harry potter, movies

#150 – Apartment Pondering

with 6 comments

My 150th comic! Woo! Someone bust out the cupcakes and techno music. It’s party time.

I got some excellent birthday cards, and after hours and hours of deep and careful thought I’ve decided that the one from my sister D is simply the best. It begins innocently enough:

And then, relentlessly, takes a turn for the worse:

Written by Paul

July 16, 2007 at 12:28 pm

#149 – Baby Talk

with 8 comments

I get a lot of my best material from riding elevators. See, many people can’t stand riding those three minutes up or down in muted silence and so they attempt to make small talk with whoever is around. Me, I just stare straight ahead and count in my head until it is time to get off. Some folks try to tell me about the weather, but I merely respond with a series of mumbles.

Luckily, I can listen to people’s conversations and then not feel like such a weirdo afterwards. Because, apparently when in an elevator, you can say whatever you want to someone. See what this lady said to him? What is wrong with people? Then again, it might have been the fellow’s fault for bringing up his kid. No one loves your kid more than you, buddy. Don’t ever forget that.

Weekend plans? Let me hear ’em.

Written by Paul

July 13, 2007 at 12:43 pm

Posted in elevator lunacy

#148 – Dry(er) Humor

with 4 comments

Well, I thought it was a funny idea. Turned out I was just wasting my tongue-in-cheek humor on this fellow. That’s all right. More for you guys/gals, right?

I’m a food lover. I think many of you are as well so I’m going to tell you what I had for dinner last night. My folks and sister (not Bitsy) came up for a belated birthday dinner, and we headed out to the newly constructed Jimmy Buffett’s Cheeseburger in Paradise. Say what you will about the man’s music, but they have great food there. I started off with a glass of sangria, which my sister had as well, and we both agreed that it was a little too sweet for our fine palettes. Apps were Bayou Crab and Spinach Dip and the super addicting Sweet Potato Chips. So good. Main course for me were the Coral Reef Crab Cakes which came with rice and a red pepper aioli sauce. But I enjoyed the coconut curry dipping sauce that came with my mother’s Tropical Chicken Satay way more. Next up, desserts. Yes, more than one. I picked out the Jamaican Apple Crisp and then our waitress couldn’t stop raving over their restaurant’s signature Chocolate Nachos. Those were interesting, to say the least of it. Then, after all this food, I exploded into a thousand pieces.


Written by Paul

July 12, 2007 at 12:18 pm

Posted in foodwhore, idiots