…and you thought your life was exciting!

#109 – Boo Baseball

with 7 comments

Gather round, kids. It’s time for Grandpa Pauly to tell you all a story from ages past. Well, more like from when I was eight or nine years old.

You see, there was a time when I played baseball with the community league. Granted, I was generally out in left field and warming the bench. At point I played pitcher, which was like being the lead singer of a choir. Anyways, there was this one game that I’ll never forget. My team versus another team. Yeah, I know–captivating stuff. Now, the other team was known for its pitcher, a big stick of a boy that could throw harder and faster than…mmm…God? No, Thor. Yeah, let’s go with Thor. I was warming up to bat, watching my teammate slink his way up to the plate. Everyone was, more or less, afraid.

Then my teammate got pegged in the back with a speedball. He dropped to the ground, writhing, calling out in pain. The game was put on hold for a second as parents and coaches rushed over to check on him. He wasn’t in good condition; they ended up having to take him to the hospital for internal injuries. After that, the game resumed.

Guess who was up to bat next?

My coach kept signaling for me to bunt (I was an excellent bunter by the way, if such a trait is admirable). I didn’t know the sign for “you’re a crazy man.” I do remember my knees shaking, my hands growing hot and sweaty, that stupid helmet on my head feeling heavier than a rock. The pitches came, and they came fast. From here on, I don’t know what happened next. Did I bunt? Did I strike out? I know I didn’t get hit with the pitch. But everytime someone does–whether it’s the boy above in Little League or Joe Schmoe with the bigwigs or Susy Q in softball–I think of my teammate, shaking in the dirt like a broken toy. I’m 96% sure that the pitcher is in jail these days.

Doesn’t storytime rule?


Written by Paul

May 18, 2007 at 12:42 pm

Posted in sports

7 Responses

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  1. I may not have been the kid on said team, nor in the comic; but I was a kid on a baseball team at the age of nine or ten and I was beaned. Now, maybe it’s the fact that I’ve always been bigger than kids my age, but it actually did’t hurt much. In fact, I was probably beaned every game I played in, kinda got used to it and became the easiest way for me to get on base.

    Oh storytime, you rule!


    May 18, 2007 at 7:37 pm

  2. I guess getting wailed by baseballs over and over helped build…character? Yeah, I’m pretty sure that my coach put someone else on first after my teammate was taken away. Glad you enjoyed storytime. Now, go fetch Grandpa a sandwich…


    May 19, 2007 at 1:07 pm

  3. Boy that was (yawn) boring, er, i mean fascinating. Tell me more. Oh no – wait don’t. Biff I just can’t handle the memories…


    May 19, 2007 at 6:04 pm

  4. Bitsy, you are so mean! Here’s a story you can relate to. One time, a sister that will go unnamed, toss my favorite unflattable clown punchy-bag down the stairs and made me cry. SO MEAN!


    May 20, 2007 at 4:39 am

  5. I still laugh when I think of that! Remember the time I locked baby you and Mom in your bedroom! That was fun, too! PS – Unflattable is so not a word. But here’s one – inflatable!
    I heart you man! Athena says meow!
    PPS – Maybe I’ll get you a new one for your birthday! Yes – a really creepy clown that no matter how many times you knock it to the floor, it’ll keep popping up and grinning at you!


    May 20, 2007 at 6:10 am

  6. Why is it when people say something builds character whatever happens before it or after it sucks? You’d never say when your friend won the lotto that built character, you’d probably just call him an a-hole! *grumble grumble*


    May 21, 2007 at 12:42 am

  7. Bitsy, tell Athena I said meooow meow mrrrrrrrow mrrrow meow meow purr prrrrrr purr meow. Just like that.


    May 21, 2007 at 1:52 pm

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